måndag 31 mars 2014

The darkness is blinding consuming me.

I'm very sorry for not writing here for almost a week but my charger doesn't work so i haven't been able to write. But Panda is here now so my laptop is fully charged for a while.

I've been chatting a bit on Meow, & Panda has stayed the night, we've been going out for walks & having fun :3 It's weigh-in again tomorrow... I hope i haven't gained but i don't know..
Oh yeah the present i gave Panda was a shirt with a picture of us & some texts.

I'm gonna order my shoes tomorrow i hope, i love them hihi. I guess i'm really fashion fixated, but like i have to look good when my face don't & plus i love clothes & makeup.
Now i want to make a post with pictures of all my favorite clothes ^.^

Now that mom knows about my self harm i don't feel the need to hide as badly as i used to, like i couldn't sleep without a long sleeved shirt that has holes in them so i can put my thumbs trough them so my shirts doesn't slip up... If that makes any sense.

Right now i'm writing ( duh ) drinking tea & chatting on Meow Oh & listening to music.
Panda is also here of course sleeping over for the second day & she's probably coming here again.
I just have to say that u love You me at six's new album! So good take a look :3

I have been walking about 14000 steps according to my app on my phone today.

I don't feel better mentally or anything more like it's worse, it never gets easier, i'm getting sick of this like i don't know how to explain... Anything really.
I can't see that it is a way out of this, i have nothing to strive for, nothing that makes me want to be better. I guess that's the problem.

Of Mice & Men – Identity Disorder


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