I purged up some of the ice cream i ate but i didn't make me feel better at all because there's so much left in my stomach... Ugh
My mom accidentally smelled my fingers & she said they smelled like smoke & asked me if i were sneak smoking? or something i just shrugged it off & like what i don't smell anything...
It feels like she knows because there's like no other reason my fingers would smell smoke...
So weigh-in tomorrow & i'm dreading like hell, i know that i've gained & i just want to scream & starve. I probably should do some thinking because these couple of months hasn't gone forwards just backwards & i really need to think about what i should do... Like should i eat more?
Should i just stop eating? Or just stay like this?
I really want to visit my friend but that means i need to gain loads of weight & i don't know if i'm ready, i don't think i can do it. Ugh i really don't know what do right now i'm so freaking lost.
I'm just wandering around in the desert.
Of Mice And Men – Glass Hearts